1 Nov - 21 Feb, it's almost 4 months now, in fact this is my 2nd semester doing my post-grad here. When I looked into myself about what I had done in the past 'semester', I think that is ok, I feel no need to say sorry to myself.
In the past semester, I had got my scholarship, covering tuition fees and 2.3k per month for allowance, I think it wasn't a bad option, just that in return I have got to work in M'sia at least 5 years after getting my PhD. I think this is all right for a person like me that had started feeling a need to settle down.
I have no intention to do my post-doc or getting a job overseas, at least by far. However, I have a strong instinct that I should stay and try to build up my career at KL, but that would be happening after 2 years. It's always good to have a plan though, PLANS GIVE NO HARMS.
Nowadays, I think my supervisor has been putting much pressures on me, not really pressure actually, It's the expectation or demand that he has risen it up, he seems to be stressed up these days by his grant defense, hopefully he will be fine. And for some reasons, I think that the way he treats me is extremely different from how he does to others, not the bad side, but the up-side. I am not really certain if this is a good thing or not. Anyways, I will try my best to finish my research within these 2 years and go KL for my continuous life.
Sometimes, I just feel that my responsibility is there, but shameful to say that I don't really know how to execute it, maybe I am just too weak on this aspect. Just assume that I am still studying, taking no charge of the execution of responsibility. I can only make it real after 2 years. Give myself a period, maybe this is not a bad idea.......
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